Conventional wisdom says that your outer appearance should give off some serious upward mobility vibes. That’s why I dress as if I were in one…
CHICAGO — Freelance marketing writer Jim Podaski reportedly channeled his inner “Mad Men” protagonist Don Draper today for his latest blog post for Cheap Used…
SAVANNAH, Ga. — Local punk Jake Stanton used a photo of a trashy apartment as his Zoom background yesterday to hide the true nature of…
DENVER — Local nerd Eugene Boscroft asked aghast record store employees moments ago to help him find old compilations from Fat Wreck Chords, which he…
ALISO VIEJO, Calif. — The And1 clothing company is introducing a new line of shorts crafted specifically for hardcore kids who never play basketball, multiple…
CHICAGO — Local musician and self-proclaimed Antifa member Shaun Straut is proudly sporting a “This Machine Kills Fascists” sticker on his bassoon, which sources admit…
TACOMA, Wash. — The funeral for moderately popular local musician Adam Klein was rather well-attended despite being held on a Tuesday night, sources who waited…
CLEVELAND — Local woman and total poser Brandi Herrera could not recall her moon sign yesterday when asked, despite her identifying as a lesbian, according…
HATTIESBURG, Miss. — Local poser Justin Lindsey listed several brands of protein bars last night after multiple members of the hardcore scene asked him to…
CINCINNATI — Local punk Jon Weiner was outed as a poser yesterday after mistakenly spelling the name of popular punk band Descendents with an ‘A,’…
Here at the Hard Times, we like to revisit albums that we are required to revere. Many of these works have forever changed the way…
HOUSTON — Local woman Claudia Sims was criticized yesterday for wearing a NASA T-shirt, despite the fact that she has never traveled outside of the…
I was at this show last night and this totally lame poser in a totally lame poser band was playing his bass with a pick!…
LOS ANGELES — A mysterious pair of sunglasses discovered by local crust punk and drifter Rick “Zilch” Toombs allegedly allow him to see which punks…
MISSOULA, Mont. — Real-deal, bloodsucking vampire Count Adhemar Chauve-Souris was vehemently dismissed as a poser today by mall goths he was recruiting for his gaggle…