According to one source within the organization, these appear to be the matches the Beyond Wrestling General Manager is planning for “Beyond Championship Wrestling” at…
Medal of Honor Awarded to McDonald’s Employee Who Put Chicken Nugget in Trump’s Order of Large Fries
Medal of Honor Awarded to McDonald’s Employee Who Put Chicken Nugget in Trump’s Order of Large Fries
WASHINGTON — President Trump awarded the Medal of Honor, the nation’s most prestigious personal military decoration, to the “hero” who slipped a chicken nugget into…
DETROIT — A neglected Hoover WindTunnel vacuum currently stuffed in the front closet of notorious punk house The Slayboy Mansion is desperately yearning for the…
It’s hard to believe that the “Fashioncore” era of hardcore is nearly two decades old. This was a time that saw many people dying their…
REVERE, Mass. — Misguided 43-year-old street punk Martin “Peanut” Landers announced today that he will be upping his cigarette intake to help himself lose 15…
ST. PAUL, Minn. — Local woman Connie Walters is fed up with all of her friends constantly asking for financial advice, based solely on the…
LOS ANGELES — Local girlfriend Ashley Wagner mistakenly believes Bryce Latterby, her boyfriend of six months, is actively engaged in a sultry conversation with Instagram…
CUPERTINO, Calif. — Apple released a surprising new report today, revealing that the average iPhone owner uses roughly half of their storage space to save…
POMONA, Calif. — Aging punk Kelvin Obera hired a no-nonsense private investigator last week, trying to determine the exact time the headlining band would take…
IRVING, Texas — Senior ExxonMobil executive Robert Stone announced today that his company will donate millions of dollars toward rebuilding gas stations across southeast Australia…
MAMANUCA ISLANDS, Fiji. — Crew members currently filming the latest season of “Survivor” were shocked to discover that a scab covered, emaciated, crust punk they…
WHITMAN, Mass. — Small town police officer Patrick O’Brien is looking forward to reuniting with old friends and classmates while they’re in the back seat…
ANCHORAGE, Alaska — Local 14-year-old Colton Blewitt resisted the urge to tell his father he loved him today, fearing the declaration might be perceived as…
SAN FRANCISCO — Lifelong straight edger Timothy Sharp tipped $5 on a glass of tap water last night, thanks to his ignorance of bar etiquette…
CRANSTON, R.I. — Punk father and son team Jerry and Steve Pappas began work today restoring a mint condition 2017 Ford Econoline van to get…