LOS ANGELES — Ronnie Jordan, the bassist for Los Angeles glam-rock band Humdinger, reached out to his band’s lead singer Dikki Spitz via celebrity video-sharing…
VENICE, Calif. — Local hardcore guy Dan “Nukka” Reilly was rushed to the emergency room with massive blood loss yesterday after attempting to remove the…
As a 20 year veteran of the police force, I am getting real tired of everyone bashing the shield. Somehow wearing this uniform every day…
As a proud American, I’m always looking for new business ventures. After a lot of research, my wife and I decided that we should start…
SEATTLE — Seattle Police Lieutenant Chuck Haines is beginning to worry that his dealer may be tampering with his cocaine, following a rash of well-publicized…
WASHINGTON — Republicans across the nation are reckoning with a party-wide fissure over whether pineapple is a suitable topping for bootlicking, sending think-tanks everywhere scrambling…
LOS ANGELES — Local tattoo artist “Big” Frank Kowlaski admitted today that he was profoundly impacted by a tattoo he inked last week of a…
DYERSVILLE, Iowa — The magical “Field of Dreams” that once hosted the ghosts of baseball greats like “Shoeless” Joe Jackson and Mel Ott has been…
I know all you libs are sitting home and watching the Lamestream Media right now. You’re seeing these “protestors” get picked off the street by…
LOS ANGELES — Former Misfits vocalist Michale Graves has successfully unseated Glenn Danzig as the band’s most ridiculous vocalist following a recent announcement that he…
WASHINGTON — Worried about industry typecasting, representatives of local crisis actor Daniel Mauer say he is seeking a wider range of roles, hoping to finally…
SPRINGFIELD, Mo. — 64-year-old captor Charles Lynn Gartner’s basement-dwelling hostages remain blissfully unaware of the global crisis happening right outside their cage, sources feeding them…
LINCOLN, Neb. — Local stoner Dan “Stems” Thompson overcame the crushing despair of social isolation today by attempting to create a one-person drum circle while…
I am so sick of being left out. Every year 4/20 rolls around and the entire country throws this huge celebration for everyone who smokes…
In this very trying time, it is important that we are able to have a rational conversation with those in charge of our future. We…