A big part of our job here at Hard Style is to introduce our readers exciting new bands (ever since those bands offered to pay us to promote them on the site.)
So, without further ado, Hard Style is proud to present the top 50 bands you should check out who also paid us to be on this list:
1. Gash Station
First on our list is feminist punk band Gash Station, showcased here because of their blisteringly fast speed, no-holds-barred lyrics, and hefty promotions budget. We even said we were only charging them 70% of their male counterparts because of the wage gap. And we lied!
2. The Bindle Brothers
For those of you who thought folk punk was dead, don’t nod off on The Bindle Brothers. They are redefining a genre built on integrity by paying for promotion.
3. Evisceratops
Next on the list is metal band Evisceratops. We’re including them as one of our top bands out of respect to their bone-crunching riffs and number crunching social media manager.
4. 3 Doors Down
After playing Donald Trump’s inauguration, 3 Doors Down was thrust back into the national spotlight after what must have felt like, to them, decades of obscurity. 3DD is definitely one of our bands to watch and they must have something big planned this year because you would not believe how much money they threw at us to include them in this list. Like, enough money that we’d be willing to just make up a vague list of “top bands” so we’d have something to put them on.
Related: We Ranked Every Rancid Album by Whether it is ‘…And Out Come The Wolves’
5. The Stripey Lords
Next up is British easycore outfit The Stripey Lords. They’re very influenced by modern easycore bands like Chunk, No Captain Chunk, but with a hint of that classic alternative rock sound reminiscent of rock giants 3 Doors Down. Also, does anyone know how to convert British pounds to real dollars?
6-50. 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down, 3 Doors Down.
Sorry we did this, but it was A LOT of money.