Look at all you suckers, shelling out over a hundred dollars for forty-five minutes with some “expert” to help deal with your issues. Not me, baby! I found a way to actually make money with my problems. Did a therapist come up with the idea to discuss my father’s alcoholism while thousands of strangers listen on their commutes? Nope. They recommended a combined approach of graded exposure and dialectical behavioral therapy but I didn’t stick around to learn what that meant. Let’s get PODding, my dude!
Podcast listeners want to hear reality and that is exactly what I give them. Why should I pay one person to hear my darkest secrets when advertisers will pay me to tell those secrets to the world? Say what you will about capitalism, but it’s not a bad psychologist.
There is nothing more mentally revitalizing than airing my family’s dirty laundry in between ads for stamps and erectile dysfunction medication. I leave my recording studio/walk-in-closet after every episode feeling completely rejuvenated knowing that I let everyone know my grandparents are swingers. Sorry, they were swingers. They’re not dead or anything, they’re just super old and gross now.
Sure, my mother calls me in tears after every episode but harming others is a small price to pay for self-healing. I’m really not telling my listeners anything all that salacious. That’s behind the Patreon paywall. I would never discuss how my foot fetish ruined my marriage for less than 5 dollars a month.
You can keep your CBT, EDMR, DBT, and MBT. The only three-letter word I need is POD.