SACRAMENTO, Calif. — The Robles Park neighborhood will soon host a temporary art installation, an event largely received as “…fine, I guess, but more food…
C’mon, what are you, some kinda’ pussy?! Do this beer bong, bro! Don’t wuss out on me. I invite you to my home, supply you…
DOVER, N.H. — A recently worn necktie was informed yesterday that it will remain knotted and in its owners closet until it is once again…
JENKS, Okla. — Jenks East Intermediate School 8th-grader Dylan Barker reportedly humbled himself earlier this week by removing a single earbud to listen to something…
Dear Scabby: My friend in his mid-20’s has been living in his parents’ shed and subsisting off of death metal, frozen food from Costco, cheap…
TULSA, Okla. — Adamant atheist, open homosexual, and hardcore punk Ed Rossi is technically a better Christian than his biological, evangelical family that disowned him…
PITTSBURGH — A local punk house is gearing up for its fourth consecutive year of flu season, now plaguing residents for the equivalent of one…
NEW YORK — Legendary musician Sting is celebrating today the second anniversary of a full-body spiritual orgasm that began during a 2017 tantric session with…
UNDISCLOSED — A secret job opening for an entry level position in the Illuminati posted today requires a minimum of 3-5 years prior experience working…
RENO, Nev. — Local man and former alcoholic Richard McCann allegedly considers himself “totally sober” now, after switching the focus of his addiction from alcohol…
Dear Scabby: It’s only a couple weeks into the new year and I’m already ready to give up on my resolutions, how do you stay…
Due to the countless allegations against pop punk bands regarding inappropriate interactions with young fans, we were hesitant to sit down with frontman of local…
I have never been a religious man. That all changed the moment I came to the realization that, despite the fact that every blowhard entertainer…
WINSTON-SALEM, N.C. — Medallion Social Club regular Andrew Vanscoy grew irate late Friday evening with jovial bar patrons he somehow viewed as more obnoxious than…
TOWSON, Md. — Local residents, roommates and casual weed smokers Jon Bastien, Kyle Umbridge, and Mark Vincent will likely be featured on an upcoming Viceland…