Richard Gere is known to be one of the silver foxes of Hollywood. With a full head of peppered grey hair, a chin that would…
UNITED STATES — Straight guy musicians from around the country who usually can’t shut the fuck up about how much they love Asian women suddenly…
BIRMINGHAM, Ala. — Local man James Bo finally fulfilled his lifelong dream of growing out his hair last month, only to discover it happened to…
NORCROSS, Ga. — Local man Craig Barnett, who quit smoking in 1995, discovered a box yesterday filled with Camel cigarettes’s now-obsolete Camel Cash, prompting him…
NEW YORK — Self-described “cinema aficionado” Kevin Clifford has spent the past several months becoming fluent in Japanese in order to “watch” Kurosawa movies while…
AUSTIN, Texas — Local 20-somethings Ashton Knoll and Kevin Stohl were approved yesterday for a second mortgage on their fiddle leaf fig tree, which the…
BOSTON — A study by researchers at MIT has found that nearly every person who has publicly denounced a canceled artist continues to listen to…
CHICAGO — Local man Shaun Clemens is reportedly planning to spend St. Patrick’s Day in his usual leprechaun costume, drinking alone in his room this…
PHILADELPHIA — Local Irish-themed punk rock band The Drunken Fighting Lads are being suspiciously protective of the ethnic background results they received in a recent…
WALDORF, Md. — Otherwise well-adjusted 37-year-old adult Sean Collier realized yesterday that he still folds under the slightest peer pressure despite being decades removed from…
WORCESTER, Mass. — Local punk Britney Callahan assured onlookers moments ago that despite the rather violent scuffle she was involved in outside the Walter’s Bar…
AGOURA HILLS, Calif. — Local nü-metal band Hog Washer can’t decide which of the countless butthole puns they thought of over the last six months…
LOS ANGELES — An alleged serial killer and millennial is taunting LAPD and terrorizing the city through a series of deranged, emoji-laden letters, angry and…
VACAVILLE, Calif. — Punk teens and local high school students Bri Chambers and Daniel Hernandez ditched their Zoom classes late yesterday morning to smoke cigarettes…
TUCSON, Ariz. –– Local woman Anaya Marquez is concerned that pursuing a relationship with her friend David Alameda could jeopardize the incredible sex they’ve been…