LOS ANGELES — Def Leppard drummer Rick Allen had his other arm surgically removed in an overtly cocky “act of defiance” that stunned the rock…
Norwegian Authorities Catch US Black Metal Band Attempting to Cross Border Without Weapons
TRONDHEIM, Norway — Norwegian customs officials detained U.S. black metal band VVulfblud during their Scandinavian tour for not having any weapons on their persons whatsoever,…
ORLANDO, Fla. — Part-time Arby’s fry cook Marty Pitts recently asked coworker Clint Kettering if fronting local metal band Intoxicunt is as lucrative as Pitts…
Black Metal Band Tactfully Asks Widow’s Permission to Film Music Video During Husband’s Funeral Service
WILKES-BARRE, Pa. — Local black metal band Decapitated Forest tactfully asked recently widowed Jolene Watkins Thursday evening if they could film their upcoming music video…
TAMPA, Fla. — Death-metal band Cannibal Corpse and pop singer Nicki Minaj are working on a surprising collaboration birthed from a mutual appreciation of “ass…
Guitarist on Deathbed Sounds Out Killer Riff to Rest of Band
ELGIN, Ill. — Arthur McInerney, lead guitarist for the technical death metal band Magmarok, passed away Thursday following complications with Type 2 Diabetes, but not…
Metal Lyricist Struggling to Find Right Word to Rhyme With ‘Maggot-Ridden Anal Contusion’
SHREVEPORT, La. — Goat Cadaver frontman and lyricist Jake Reid reportedly hit a wall in his songwriting process late last night after struggling to find…
LANSING, Mich. — The frontman of Christian metalcore band Kiss Me Judas predicted last night that one of his bandmates would soon betray him, confirmed…
Grindcore Band Designing Album Art Pissed About Lack of Fair Use Mutilated Baby Photos
SHAMROCK, Texas — The lack of fair use photos of mutilated babies has left local grindcore band Rectal Distress frustrated and scrambling to find the…
MEMPHIS, Tenn. — Members of death metal band Bastard Death Satan Machine believe their drummer has been intentionally sabotaging their band’s relationship to fuel passionate…
BOSTON — Local metalhead Timothy Bogart’s planned early arrival at the airport was derailed last week when he could not find a single non-offensive shirt…
DALLAS — Death metal band Moruthal experienced record-low turnouts for their show last Friday night after accidentally printing the time and location information in the…
If you were a fan of Limp Bizkit during the rise of nu metal, here’s a scandal you may have missed: During the height of his…
Kid in Carcass Shirt a Little Too Good at Frog Dissection
ANCHORAGE, Alaska — West Anchorage High School student Bobby Logan, known locally as “that kid in the Carcass shirt,” stunned his peers in biology class…
Karaoke Singer Doesn’t Know What to Do During “War Pigs” Instrumentals
TEMPE, Ariz. — Karaoke enthusiast Dain Whitcomb had “no idea” what to do during the instrumental parts of Black Sabbath’s classic song “War Pigs,” according…