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What Is an Incel and Why Did We Use a Picture of Elvis Costello for This Article?

In light of the Toronto van attack more and more people are asking the question “What is an incel?” Simply put an incel is someone who considers themselves to be “involuntarily celibate” and resents society at large for not providing them with the opportunity to have sex.

More important question, why did we use a photo of music icon Elvis Costello for this article?

I mean what are we implying? He’s not an incel. I mean sure a lot of his songs are about romantic cruelty but the guy isn’t celibate.

Wait, is he celibate? Did I read somewhere that he doesn’t have sex in order to keep all of his energy for musical creativity? Wait, no, that was Prince. And either way that’s volcel, not incel.

Elvis Costello is a rock star. He’s probably having sex right now. He’s probably seen and done things sexually that you or I couldn’t possibly even dream of. What were we thinking?

Is it the hats? Guy wears a lot of hats. Incels wear big hats right? Right? No wait that’s pick up artists. Is there some crossover there? I’m so confused.

Related: What Is An “Incel” and How Can We Give Their Movement More Attention and Validity?

 

I mean I like Elvis Costello. My Aim Is True is a great album. Wait do incels like Elvis Costello? No, they don’t right? They probably listen to like just Foghat and L.L Cool J on compact disc or some shit.

Ok well if you’re reading this you clicked on it, so theres something there, right? Some kind of dot connect?

Ok I just googled “Elvis Costello Incel.” Nothing. God, I can’t get fired right now.