CLEVELAND — Local goth Stacy “Scheherazade” Kowalski reportedly may add a light gray sweater to her otherwise black wardrobe, potentially due to her fulfilling relationship,…
Yeah, I hear what you’re saying about the awful car wreck you got into this morning. Whatever it was you were telling me about that,…
SEATTLE — Prospective model Magda “Mimi” Maiers had the Shutterstock watermark tattooed directly onto her forehead last week in the hopes of putting herself ahead…
I see your point and I agree. The world is a place full of devastating tragedy but also equally powerful compassion. As much as I…
SACRAMENTO, Calif. — Local bouncer Terry Brawn initiated an important and revealing third look last night at a potential patron’s driver’s license before allowing entry…
Aries (March 21-April 19) Your temper will be your downfall this week, Aries. Pick your battles. Your Marxist memes on Facebook are concerning your family,…
BROOKLYN — Self-proclaimed Led Zeppelin expert Gil Costa cited local insufferable Tolkien aficionado Brian Turner yesterday as a major influence on Costa’s Zeppelin-themed social media…
As we all know, animal abuse is a major problem in the world. But the insidious thing about it is that while some abuse is…
CINCINNATI — 32-year-old claims adjuster Aaron Madson spent the past week listening to classic nü-metal alone in his car “as a joke” for hours before…
Success in the music industry is less about talent and more about who you know. More specifically, it’s about who you know and are able…
CHICAGO — The Diva Cup menstrual device disappointed fans and promoters alike last night, canceling a gig at the last minute because the venue was…
EL PASO, Texas — Kaplan, Inc. is releasing a new, signature model of their SAT Reading & Writing Prep book to honor the intense vocabulary…
NEW YORK — Singer/multi-instrumentalist Corey Mathis successfully created the illusion of gang vocals last week by re-recording himself dozens of times, according to the credits…
FORT LAUDERDALE, Fla. — An alluring, mysterious punk puzzled patrons of DIY venue The Back Room last Friday by leaning against a wall and casually…
I Liked Your Post so Why Didn’t You Like All My Passive Aggressive Comments on It
What the hell?! I took the time to like your post and then carefully picked it apart in the comments in a way that allowed…